Sometimes I worry. I know I am not supposed to, but it sneaks up on me. Invades my thoughts. Causes my heart to beat faster, I become frustrated and snappish at my kids. I start to ask internally why my husband can't have a "regular" job. And then God reminds me He is Here. Right now. Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow. FOREVER. And He knows my circumstances. He knows what I am fretting about.
Being grain farmers means we have a lot of money out and don't make any until harvest. Which is at the end of the year. Which can feel like a veeerrryyy long time away. We do double crop so we have money coming in from our oat hay to help hold us over until we harvest our corn. However, we don't always get paid in a timely manner. So I was kind of feeling the crunch on Monday. Big time. We had some big bills due, and I was feeling anxious about how we would pay for them.
At the start of our school morning, we always read a chapter out of the Bible and then take turns praying. I always close the prayer time, and while I closed our prayer time on Monday, I prayed and asked the Lord to please stir in our oat's buyer the need to pay us for our hay. I didn't really think much about it again, because, lets face it, when you are homeschooling three busy little girls, your mind can't really wander too far!
We finished school, and while I finished getting lunch ready, I asked the girls to go to the mailbox and get our mail. I watched them come in the door and I saw a big envelope. I picked it up and it felt thick!! Which meant there were a lot of weight slips in there. Which meant we were getting paid a sizable amount. I fell to my knees right there in the kitchen and tears came to my eyes. Not even three hours after I prayed that halfhearted, feeble prayer, God answered. I am so not worthy. Not even to kiss the sandals on His feet.
God doesn't always answer in as swift a manner. But He is certainly able. So why am I surprised when He does? Do I not believe He hears me the first time I ask? And when He takes longer to answer, does that mean He doesn't care as much, or isn't listening? Absolutely not. All I can say is God is Sovereign. He is all-knowing. Sometimes it takes longer to have our prayers answered because we need to grow in faith. Or there is something that we need to get right in our relationship with God that is hindering a move of God in our lives. And sometimes God likes to show off, and knock our socks off. He likes to remind us Who He is. And I am so thankful that I belong to Him. I just wanted to share this little testimony. No matter what you may be waiting on God for, don't ever doubt that He doesn't love you, that He isn't listening, and that He won't move on your behalf. He will. Because He said so.