Review

Today I felt it necessary, while folding laundry, to review and re-evaluate the reasons why we are homeschooling. You see, I had a rough morning. In fact, lately it feels like we are kind of in a rough spot. It feels like I am pulling teeth to get any of the lessons done. And I really hate that. So here are some of the reasons why we decided to homeschool:
-my husband's slow time is over the winter and right before harvest, so for us to travel anywhere together as a family, it would have to be right when school is starting or during the middle of the year.
-I want to encourage close relationships between my children. I want my girls to be each other's best friends. I have seen too many families drift apart once older siblings start school and feel more pressure to fit in with their friends and feel that is isn't "cool" to spend time with younger siblings or the family in general. I know this doesn't happen in all families, but knowing how I treated my younger brother and sisters when I was a teenager, I don't want this to happen in our family. And I am not saying that it couldn't happen in our home anyway, but I think homeschooling will discourage it.
-I want to iron out any relationship issues I have with my children now, when they are younger, then have them in school the majority of their day and only have a couple hours with them each day, and not realizing we have some issues until they are teenagers and til then, it could be too late. This is the one reason I have to remember when I am doubting myself. I'd rather deal with this now, then when they are in their teens. But it's still hard.
-I also don't like that school gets them the majority of the day. I only would get the morning, which is rushed, trying to get out the door to catch a bus, and a couple hours in the evening which would be spent doing homework, any extracurricular activities and the whole bedtime routine. Not much time for cultivating relationship. Not to mention that they would be tired and cranky, and not the most pleasant.
-I do believe that this is God's will for our lives in this season right now. And that is the most important reason of all. It's just hard when I have had a challenging morning, and I can hear the voice in my head saying that I am a terrible mother, that I am ruining my kids, that I am a bad teacher, that they aren't learning anything, why don't I just give up? But then I also have to remind myself that God doesn't condemn. He will convict, and He definitely has, when my attitude has been less then the best, but He will not condemn me, call me names, or make me feel like a loser. That is the Devil. The one who opposes anyone who is trying to live out their Holy calling, God's plan for their life. Who doesn't want to see close, loving families. He would rather have us running in a hundred different directions, not eating a meal together, or enjoying each other's company.
I know homeschooling can be a polarizing subject. I believe that it's a personal decision, something that God has to call you to do, because it's one of the hardest things you will ever do. I went to public school and had a pretty good experience. But that was 13 years ago and a lot has changed since then!
So I am glad that I had this little review. It's good to reflect and remember why we do the things we do. Just have to push through this tough time, the view from the mountain top will be beautiful!

the view from my front porch