Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Girlhood dreams

I was driving to Douglas this morning, on my way to the grocery store, minus the kids, and my mind wandered to an old girlhood dream of mine that has just never died. Ever since I was a little girl, I have been captivated by horses, and have always wanted one. When I was younger, my dad wouldn't let me get one because he was afraid I would lose interest and it would become his responsibility. Which may have happened, because horses need to be rode and have time spent with them, and I confess, there were times in my younger days where I was kind of flighty. But this is a dream that has never died. When I was in college, a group of us went to Tulsa, OK and stayed with Corina's uncle who lived on a ranch. And yes, he had horses. He took us all out on a ride, and it was so much fun. It was pretty nerve racking too, to be on top of a horse and knowing it was a long way down! But it was so much fun! After I got married and moved out to Arizona, where there are tons of wide open spaces, it just seems natural that horses should be part of the landscape. But it has never seemed the right time to get one. Our children are small, and so I don't have the time to ride real often, not to mention the fact that my husband and I don't really know a lot about horses. But, oh I still want one! Perhaps someday. I always had this alternate personality where I wanted to be a cowgirl. Hat, boots and all. But I think about that and think everyone will realize what a poser I am! But there is something so alluring about riding across an open range, hair flying in the breeze, and feeling absolutely free. And I think that's what I want most of all. Freedom. Freedom from all life's stresses, frustrations, and pain. From the joy and time drainers of this life. Not from my family and friends, but from all the complications that come from the world. Freedom.


Ashlea said...

used to be flighty? :)

love you laura, and someday, someday it will happen. even if it's in heaven.

Landis said...

oooh i like that, riding horses in heaven! One day when you and Nate build your own house together, just ask him to add on a horse ranch. :) Here's to childhood dreams!